On Becoming GiGi

 

Never in a million years did I believe that I was going to become a Grandmother at the age of 42! I would have told people that they are crazy. My oldest child said, all of the time I might add, “I’m never getting married or having kids.” My reply was always the same, “You may fall in love one day and change your mind.”

Ashleigh is very intelligent and beautiful. When it comes to the opposite sex, she was mean to all those that looked like a boy and smelled like a boy. We used to correct her and inform her that she was “never going to get a boyfriend if she continued to be mean.” Then one day, I decided, I did not have to worry about her having a serious boyfriend if she continued to treat boys this way. If I just kept my mouth shut, she would solve the boyfriend issue on her own.

This is how I got through the dating timeframe with my oldest child. I guess you could say that I took a shortcut of sorts. It really was the easiest thing to do. With dances and Prom in the near future, I did not have to worry about Ashleigh having a date. Now don’t get me wrong, she was attractive and plenty of boys were interested, again it was the meaness.

During her senior year, she met someone that did not know of her “way”. He was smitten and she was too. It did not take long for the two to fall in love and decide to get married. She graduated a semester early and knowing my head-strong daughter, if I told her she could not get married, she would have ran off and done it anyway.

I wanted to be involved and be present. She had a small ceremony and reception. The reception was put together in three days because her original plans to marry in Cate Square Park were ruined with rain in the forecast.

A couple of weeks before the Wedding, I was told about her pregnancy. This was a little harder to take in. I am very thankful for this blessing, but knew this would change her world forever. If the marriage didn’t work out, then it didn’t. However all of our lives would change with Baby Escobar’s arrival into the world.

Even though I am a nurse, I cannot say that I have any experience with labor, and especially delivery. I was a cardiac nurse. There were no vaginal deliveries during my L&D rotation in nursing school. When Ashleigh was little, I was going to witness my niece being born vaginally. We got to the hospital in the middle of the night. In the morning, Ashleigh’s dad brought her to the hospital where we waited for hours. Ashleigh wanted ice cream so we went to the cafeteria to get some and in the few minutes we were gone, Elizabeth was born. I was so mad!

Fast forward 16ish years, Ashleigh wanted me at Alexander’s birth and I was determined to be there. When her mucus plug passed, I wasn’t sure that is what happened especially since there was no blood. We had to look it up on Dr. Google. Most people that commented on the posts I read said that they went into labor about a week after passing their plug. Like clock work, Ashleigh called me on my lunch break upset that she was beginning to spot. I calmly told her to go to the ER. She was almost hysterical, but again calmly, I stated, “Go to the ER.”

The panic set in once I hung up the phone. I realized that I needed to get her. I did not want to cancel my class so I gave directions to one of my students on what was to be completed the rest of the afternoon. When I got there, she said she felt like she kept peeing on herself. Oh, her water broke, but was just a trickle. I think we were in denial that this could be it because she was only 36 weeks pregnant. However, little man had his own plans.

We were halfway to the hospital when I realized that we were not counting contractions! They were five minutes apart, but not very painful at that time. Ashleigh just said, “They feel different from Braxton Hicks contractions.” When we were put in the observation room, the nurse checked to see if she was dilated. She was two centimeters and 70% effaced. “Oh” was my only thought at that point. I was still in denial that today was the day.

We were only in observation for 30 minutes when we were transferred to a delivery suite. I had to finally ask, “Are we in active labor?” The nurse said, “Oh, yes, today is the day.” I could not believe I heard those words. Yikes. I started texting everyone to head to the hospital.

Three hours later, I insisted that she get checked again. She was 6 centimeters. I have heard of people being in labor for days with their first child. I could not believe how fast this was happening. However, it broke my heart to see my baby in such pain and I could not doing anything about it. They finally inserted her Epidural, but it failed. Only one side was numb, they had to redo it and give her stronger medicine. The second med did the trick and luckily did not slow down the labor.

Still in denial that I was becoming a grandma, I got the word that she was 10 centimeters and ready to push. It was time for me to go back in there and experience this miracle God created. She was doing great, but Alexander’s heart rate was declining during contractions. I was surprised that I remembered what decelerations were (always afraid that I would not notice them) and worried that she might have to have a c-section.

I got in the room ready to assist in any way I could. I was on one side and Julio was on the other. We were encouraging her to push and push well to get him out. It took quite a few pushes, but he was emerging. Then I started to feel funny and let go of her leg and took a step back. I was trying not to pass out. Something that has been wrong with me was taking over my body at that most precious moment! I had no control. I could hear Ashleigh say, “Oh my God, mom! Help her!” She was panicking and I could not help! I could hear her, but something was keeping me from my daughter!!! I have always been there for her when she needed me and I couldn’t help! The only sensation I felt was a burning feeling to my left elbow.

One of the nurses helped me come to. I had no idea what had happened, nor did I fully realize where I was. Ashleigh was still pushing and I shouted, “It’s ok, mommy is alright. Keep pushing, do not worry about me!” I was still on the floor of the delivery room and was trying to get up. I was afraid to fall again. And of course, a vasovagal response kicked in. Yup, you guessed it, while I was in the bathroom, my grandson was born. I was so upset when I heard his cry because I knew he was born without me there!

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